TV Moms Guest Post

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Most of you all know that I am a WAHM to 2 kiddos.  Our son (referred to as Turkey on my site) is 3 and a half and our daughter (referred to as Little One) is 1.  We moved to TX when she was just 6 weeks old.  Starting out in a new state, with no family, in an apt with two kiddos and a travelling husband made life very hard.  I was overwhelmed by the lack of schedules and daily things checked off my list that I thrived on as a music teacher.  I still struggle with all of that and haven’t quite found my place as a WAHM (or SAHM for that matter!).  As part of my search to find myself and my place at home, I’ve asked a few blogging friends to share with you their thoughts about motherhood. The first post in this series comes from Yankee Texas Mom

Wilde once said “Life imitates art far more than art imitates life”.
 This is something that all of us who are stay at home moms (SAHM)
should remember.  The myriad of moms that are depicted in movies, books,
magazines and/or on television are typically unrealistic.  But, if you
are anything like me, those images helped to create the standards by
which you use to measure yourself as a mom.

I am a child of the 80s, so the first two shows that come to mind are Family Ties and The Cosby Show.
 As Elyse Keaton, Meredith Baxter was the mom that everyone wanted.
 Beautiful, understanding, and funny, she rarely lost her temper and
when she did, it was always justified.  Claire Huxtable, played by
Phylicia Rashad, juggled a career as an attorney with the  duties of
raising five children.  The Cosby House was always clean and she was
nearly always impeccably dressed.  

The 80s also gave us Roseanne and Married With Children,
but those characters seemed to portray the opposite end of the spectrum
for comedic purposes.  I don’t recall seeing too many shows that showed
the life of the everyday mom – SAHM or not.  Perhaps this is because
our lives are not deemed entertaining enough by the powers that be in
Hollywood.  It’s too bad really because I know there’s plenty of
entertainment in my life.  There’s also reality and here are some of the
lessons I have learned.

  • The children often write the script.
    Our three year old is a wonderful, beautiful and intelligent little
    girl.  I thank God that I had her and I love her more than I could ever
    express in words.  My love for her does not mean that there are not
    frustrating days.  Days that begin with the best of intentions.  Days
    filled with activities meant to entertain and delight her that do not
    yield the anticipated results.  Let’s take a few weeks ago as an
    example.  It was a Wednesday and so we headed on over to the local
    library for preschool story time.  This is usually followed by a trip to
    McDonald’s for a Happy Meal and an hour or so in the “climbing gym”.
     Sounds like a Kodak moment doesn’t it?  It might have been, but it was
    not.  Instead, I found myself standing in the middle of the library as
    my darling Gwenny sat on the floor crying because she did not want to
    leave the library.  It was one of those moments when, as others watch
    the performance, you want to crawl inside a hole in the floor.  It was
    another day when my daughter taught me that I cannot script out the
  • Life = Clutter.
     Yes, I have read all of the articles and blog posts about teaching
    your children to clean up after themselves.  Yes, I have watched all of
    the HGTV programs that show clever ways to design a child’s room so that
    putting away toys is fun.  And to all of that I say – ha!  I love my
    family – really I do – but I have learned that organization is not their
    strong point.  They have improved, mostly through my badgering and
    lessons in how to put things away, but I do not think I will ever truly
    win the battle.  Right or wrong, I have accepted that there are some
    things that will only get done if I do them.  And, some days, these
    things do not get done.  My house does not always sparkle, but the
    dishes can wait so that a puzzle can be done or a game can be played.
  • Personal grooming can be a luxury.
    This is one of the things that no one ever tells you ahead of time.  No
    one tells you that for the first few years of your child’s life, you
    may or may not shower on a daily basis.  In the first year of our
    daughter’s life, I often chose a nap over a shower.  My haircuts are
    often past due and it is a rare occasion that I am able to get a little
    pampering in for myself.  Make-up is not something I put on every day
    and my wardrobe could seriously use some new additions.  Sometimes I
    miss the attention I used to be able to focus on myself, but more often I
    don’t have time to think about it.

a mom is hard work.  There are no breaks or vacations from motherhood.
 You cannot go on strike, even though most of may threaten to do so.
 There’s also no finish line.  When I used to work as an HR Manager,
there were project plans, deadlines and completions.  It’s not like that
when you are a mom, especially a SAHM.   There are plenty of rewards,
but lots of challenges.

Wilde did have a point, but there are two movies that did capture part
of the truth of being a SAHM. 

In Terms of Endearment, Debra Winger’s character explains raising children to her husband by saying:

“As hard as you think it is, you end up wishing it were that easy.”

In The Bridges of Madison County, Meryl Streep’s character describes it like this:

a woman makes the choice to marry, to have children, in one way her
life begins but in another way it stops.  You build a life of details.
 You become a mother, a wife and you stop and stay steady  so that your
children can move.  And when they leave they take your life of details
with them.  And then you’re expected to move again only you don’t
remember what moves you because no one has asked in so long. Not even

I leave you with these two quotes as food
for thought about the life of a SAHM.

Yankee Texan Mom describes herself as an “East Coaster turned Texan SAHM” and as a “Professional turned full-time house wife and mother” Stop by and say hello and see what other inspirations on life as a SAHM/WAHM/Texan she’ll give you. Be sure to let her know that I sent ya!

If you’d like to submit a guest post on the subject of mothering, please e-mail me at athriftypenny at gmail dot com.  You don’t have to be a blogger either.  The more the merrier!

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